PETALUMA CALIFORNIA - PETALUMA Homes and Real Estate For Sale

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One of the most interesting and challenging aspects of real estate agency is dealing with the negotiating styles of buyers and sellers and their representatives. Over the last 25 years I have noticed an evolution among real estate professionals that has made a 'win-win' approach to negotiation more prevalent. Although not yet extinct, the 'white knight' agent, who must win for his client by vanquishing a foe, has become the exception. The trend toward principled, issues-oriented negotiation is more noticeable among agents than in the general population, and that difference sometimes makes the agent especially valuable to the client.

It is easily understood that emotions are major ingredients in the sale of a residence. People usually have a great deal more than money invested in their homes ' hard work, loving care, fond memories ' and these sometimes make it difficult to focus objectively on one's interests in a negotiation. Some reactions to an offer will reveal how personal the process becomes, as in 'What are they trying to do, steal my house?' It is dismaying when we see people form resentments toward the other party in a transaction, but worse, it leads to poor decisions.

A book that has become a popular primer for people in business and for anyone who deals with conflict resolution is Roger Fisher and William Ury's Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In (Penguin Books, 1983). At $14 it is an excellent investment. Fisher and Ury lay out principles that are equally applicable in a home purchase or in bringing peace to the Middle East. Good agreements, they explain, are created by separating the people from the problem and by focusing on interests rather than positions.

Communicating one's interests and understanding the interests of the other party can move a negotiation beyond seemingly intractable positions. A few years ago I represented a seller who received four offers on his property. The agreement that resulted had a lower price than two of the rejected offers, which was probably surprising to those unsuccessful bidders. The successful buyer was an investor who had only two days remaining to identify the property he would acquire in a tax-deferred exchange. Failure to make the identification would have cost him tens of thousands of dollars in capital gains tax, and through his agent, he made that fact known to the seller. My client had committed to a home purchase in another state, and what mattered most to him was a sale with a high degree of certainty. Had the parties focused only on price (i.e., positions) and not their respective interests, both might have failed.

Most of the agents I know will agree that a win for their clients does not mean that someone else must lose. They know that often the best way to get a good result in a negotiation is to help the other party get what he needs. As a buyer or seller, you may benefit by having a good coach who understands and acknowledges your emotions and then helps you stay on a course of principled negotiation.